“I Fart Because It’s The Only Gas That I Can Afford”

So, a friend of mine had to call in to work today because his loan was turned down and he can no longer afford to fill his car’s tank up.
As it turns out, it’ll be cheaper for him to hire somebody so that he can just ride their shoulders into work every day.

Hopefully all of you picked up on the sarcasm there.
If not, I’m sorry, on so many levels, for you.

Anyway, if you guessed that our topic this time around is going to be going to be gas, well, you might just be the brightest bulb in the crayon box.

It’s more about blame.
But it’s about gas, too.
Everyone is upset over gas prices.
Every day on Facebook, Twitter, and occasionally on MySpace (when people remember that it still exists and go check their account) people post where the best gas prices are locally.
Some radio stations even announce it during their Morning Zoo shows.
Gas prices are easily one of our biggest concerns.

What would you think if I told you that Gas Prices are the result of a lie?

One of the more common beliefs about oil prices is that OPEC sets the oil prices.
This is not entirely incorrect.
OPEC sets oil prices…but only for the nations that are members of OPEC.
(Which are: Algeria, Angola, Ecuador, Iran, Iraq, Kuwait, Libya, Nigeria, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates, and Venezuela)…http://www.opec.org/opec_web/en/about_us/25.htm
[Venezuela makes me want to inquire about how much Nazi Gold was used for the start-up, and Nigeria makes me think that Princess has to stop crying poor mouth in all of those e-mails she keeps sending me]

OPEC doesn’t set the prices for any other petroleum producing companies or nations.
Yet, the cost for gas produced by domestic sources is equivalent to the cost of gas produced by OPEC sources.

Now, people have inquired time and time again why ( 1) OPEC sets their prices so high, and ( 2 ) why the government doesn’t do anything about it..

The answers:
( 1 ) Because they can.
( 2 ) Because, technically, they can’t.

Yeah, yeah, I know.  The President can put pressure on them.
And they’ll probably let up on prices, which is a good thing, right?
Right?

Well, let me tell you what was accomplished.
The world just got to see one of the super powers bully a collective of smaller nations.
Which proves all of the bad things that the smaller nations say about us.
So, while you’re happy that gas is back down to $3.00 a gallon, your happiness is fueling the vindictive justification of at least one more ideological nutjob with not enough medication and too much acces to the internets DIY Explosive Anarchy For Dummies sections.

okay, let’s get back on course before I draw a target on my back (either an extremist target, or Federal target, I don’t want either)

What people need to remember is that Oil is NOT a Government controlled commodity.
Instead, it’s a corporate product, a business.
Business may abide by governmental law, but it runs on economic principle.
The biggest factor being Supply And Demand.
That is one of the tools OPEC uses to control their prices.
But that’s OPEC.
Domestic companies issue similar prices and make more profit.
They do this because they can.
And, because no one holds them accountable.
It is their right.
And we justify their decision through our purchases.

I have a crazy idea though.
And it only takes one US company to realize the insane genius behind it.
All it takes is one company drastically reducing their prices and then issuing a statement that they undersand and feel the same economic crunch as the rest of us, and want to do their part to help.
I guarantee that every one of their gas stations would be pumped dry within 48 hours, and they’d have earned massive customer loyalty as well.
One of two things would happen.
Either the other companies would compete by lowering their prices, or they’d ignore the competition and accept spillover business.
Either way it would be a win/win.

Now we just need some executives brave enough to do it.

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